Trucker and Pup Page 4

  Joey didn’t reply, but his mother had moved on and didn’t notice.

  “Now, young Kevin, you try my chicken soup, you’ll love it,” she said, placing a large soup plate in front of him.

  Kevin could see several lumps that he assumed were the dough balls, floating in a sea of yellow liquid.

  “Feh, that Mrs Rosenthal from down the road, she had the chutzpah to give me another chicken soup recipe last week. She told me that it was better than mine. Oy, nobody’s chicken soup is better than mine. Why, when the Rabbi’s mother was at death’s door last winter, after she had a couple of bowls of my chicken soup, she got out of her sick bed.”

  “Didn’t the Rabbi’s mother die last year?” Joey asked, dipping his spoon into his own bowl of soup.

  Mrs Goldman waved a hand in dismissal. “That was later. Probably happened after she’d had some of Mrs Rosenthal’s chicken soup.”

  Joey winked at Kevin as his mother continued to tell her tale. Kevin had to admit the soup was very good, but he could only manage half of it.

  “You not hungry? You’ll never grow up to be big and strong like my Joey if you don’t eat.”

  “I thought I was in danger of falling through the cracks in the pavement?”

  “Don’t answer back.” Mrs Goldman flicked a tea towel at her son.

  “Ouch!”

  Joey’s mother bustled around the kitchen, putting the food in the fridge and freezer. “Oy, why have you bought more bacon?” she asked, head deep inside the fridge.

  “’Cause I like it, now don’t you dare throw it away.” Joey got up from his seat to guard his fridge.

  “You’re not a good Jew. Such a disappointment. Not like…”

  “Peter Rosenthal, yeah I know, Ma,” Joey said, cutting his mother off in mid sentence.

  “He’s walking out with that nice Maureen Frank. Such a nice girl, and from a good Jewish family, too.”

  Kevin saw Joey close his eyes.

  “When are you going to settle down, Joey? You’re getting too old to be single. People will start to talk.”

  “Let them. I’m happy as I am.”

  “Feh.” She shrugged. “Such a disappointment. Not like your sister Carole.” Turning to Kevin, Mrs Goldman said, “That’s Carole with an ‘e.’”

  Joey rolled his eyes. “Ma, our Carole is hardly a good example.”

  “She got married and gave her mother a grandson.”

  “Yeah, but she’s divorced now.”

  The woman sighed. “That Maurice was no good, I never liked him, his eyes were too close together. You can’t ever trust a man whose eyes are close together. But she wouldn’t listen.” Turning to Kevin, she continued, “My children never listen. Oy, I got enough stress from my children for two people.”

  Joey rolled his eyes again. “Ma, you were fawning all over Maurice when he asked dad for Carole’s hand in marriage.”

  Joey’s mother moved on quickly. “Speaking of Carole, I’ve got to go and see her. Our Simon is misbehaving again. He needs a father figure, that’s what’s the matter with him.”

  “Okay, Ma, thanks for the food. You better be off then,” Joey said, gathering up all the empty plastic boxes and pushing them, along with his mother, toward the door.

  “Thank you very much for the soup, Mrs Goldman, it was delicious,” Kevin said, just before the woman disappeared out of the door.

  “You’re very welcome, young man. He’s so polite, Joey. You ought to take a leaf out of his book,” Kevin heard Mrs Goldman say as she was propelled out of the flat.

  * * * *

  “It’s too soon, after Cal I mean,” Kevin said into the phone.

  “Yes, but I know what you’re like, love,” Peter replied. “You start building up all these fantasies in your head, and you get upset when they don’t come true.”

  “Yeah.” Kevin swallowed a sob. “You know me too well.”

  “That’s because we were separated at birth. I know when Andy broke it off with me, I was in a world of hurt.”

  “But you recovered.”

  “Thanks to my best friend in all the world.”

  “And Terry.”

  “Yeah.” Peter sounded wistful. “I don’t know where I’d be without that man, the big lummox.”

  Kevin didn’t trust his voice, so stayed silent. He knew he shouldn’t be envious of his best friend, but it wasn’t easy. Each time he saw Peter and Terry all loving and smiling, he just wished he could have a fraction of that happiness.

  “Listen, love,” Peter broke into Kevin’s thoughts. “Do you want Terry and me to come over for the evening, keep you company?”

  “Nah, it’s okay.”

  Kevin needed to be alone to work through his feelings towards Joey. The two had talked animatedly in the truck cab that afternoon, Kevin believing they were growing closer. This seemed to be born out when Joey had comforted him when he’d lost it in the office. He couldn’t understand, therefore, the change that had come over Joey after his mother had left. Though had anything really changed? Had he misinterpreted Joey’s earlier kindness?

  “You’ve probably got plans to go out anyway,” Kevin told Peter.

  “Well, Terry did manage to get his hands on a couple of theatre tickets, but if you need us…” Peter trailed off.

  “No, love, you two go out and have a good time. I don’t think I’d be much company tonight anyway.”

  “You’re sure?”

  “Sure, I’m sure.” Kevin hoped he sounded convincing. “Just promise me you’ll give that hunk of yours a big hug from me.”

  Peter laughed. “Okay, mate, I will. Catch ya later.”

  “Yeah, later.”

  Kevin hung up the phone and sank into his only armchair and began to run the events of the day through his mind.

  He had been folding his freshly laundered clothes in Joey’s kitchen, when Joey had walked in all dressed up, looking stunning. The older man had put on a black shirt, which looked to be made of silk; it clung to his chest, displaying his bulging muscles to perfection. Kevin couldn’t help drooling as his eyes fixed themselves on the mound in Joey’s black leather trousers. They were so tight, he could swear he could make out the head of Joey’s cut penis through them. And as for the smell, Kevin didn’t know what aftershave Joey had used, but it, along with the visual signals he was receiving, caused his own dick to begin to awaken.

  Kevin had wondered what was happening. Was Joey going to take him out somewhere? Strangely the idea hadn’t filled him with panic.

  Cal had rarely taken him anywhere, and on the few occasions he did, they’d usually end up at a pub. Cal would proceed to get drunk, becoming ever more obnoxious as his state of inebriation increased.

  When they had pulled up outside Kevin’s building, Joey had merely given Kevin a perfunctory wave before revving his engine and tearing off down the road, leaving Kevin standing on the pavement feeling rather lost, even abandoned. He’d kicked himself for getting his hopes up about being taken out.

  Putting away the last of his clean laundry, Kevin tried to work out why he was feeling so low. It wasn’t as if he and Joey were going out or anything, Kevin had told the older man he couldn’t deal with another relationship.

  “So why the hell do you feel as though he’s let you down?” Kevin asked himself aloud.

  Looking at his wristwatch, Kevin wondered how he could fill the remainder of his evening. After a moment’s thought, he decided to take a shower, hoping the warm water would wash away some of his frustrations.

  Crossing the hallway outside his room, Kevin went into the communal bathroom that he was forced to share with four other people.

  As Kevin dried himself, he decided things had worked out for the best with Joey. Joey was, despite his fervent denials, too much like Cal for comfort.

  It was still early, so Kevin decided to watch some television. Flipping through the five available channels, he eventually settled on an old movie he’d seen before. Kevin soon lost himself in the plot and,
for a time at least, was able to put aside his current problems.

  After the film, Kevin occupied himself with household chores, the sameness helping to settle his thoughts.

  * * * *

  Joey knew he needed time and space to think, so he dressed himself in his best copping off gear, straddled his bike, dropped Kevin off at his place, and went for a long ride. The wind rushing past him as he pushed the bike to its limits on the motorway gave him a feeling of exhilaration, of unfettered freedom.

  Despite his loud and frequent protests to the contrary, Joey loved his mother dearly, and hated the thought of disappointing her. He’d never intended that she’d ever meet any of the men he’d had sex with. Okay, he’d actually only slept with Kevin, but even so, the encounter had unnerved him. Joey knew he could never marry and settle down, as his mother wanted, but at least if he hid his private life from his ever-vigilant mother, he could remain comfortable with his gayness.

  Even though it was still early, Joey decided to head for The Black Bear. A dose of anonymous man sex was just what he needed to sort his head out. He’d gone soft over the past 24 hours, maybe that was his problem. Yeah, he’d hook up with a good-looking twink, go back to the guy’s place and fuck out his frustrations.

  After resting his bike on its stand, Joey removed his helmet and stowed it away. Unzipping his leather jacket, he undid a couple of shirt buttons, exposing more of his furry chest. Setting his jaw and squaring his shoulders, he started walking toward the pub’s entrance. It was show time.

  The dark, warm and loud atmosphere of The Black Bear enveloped Joey, making him feel at home. Yeah, this was where he belonged, where he felt most comfortable. With a swagger, certain that a number of pairs of eyes were on him, he slowly made his way to the bar.

  “Half a pint of Diet Coke!” Joey announced to the back of the barman’s head. The barman was busy serving another customer, but Joey knew he would be served next. He’d allowed the bloke to blow him the previous month. The guy hadn’t been all that good, Joey kept feeling the guy’s teeth touch his exposed head, but the continued preferential treatment at the bar had been worth the discomfort.

  After paying for his drink—Joey never drank alcohol when he was on the prowl—he turned to survey the room. It was a little early, and the pickings weren’t all that appealing. But he could wait, he wasn’t in any hurry.

  “Um, hello,” a hesitant voice from his left broke into Joey’s thoughts.

  Turning round, he saw a balding man in his mid forties. The guy was a couple of inches shorter than him, and somewhat over-weight. Joey just stared at the man without speaking.

  The guy licked his lips, his expression of hunger wavering slightly. The man wasn’t Joey’s type, but he thought as there weren’t many other people about, he could amuse himself by playing the game for a while.

  Joey had once taken pity on an older man; he’d been feeling rather charitable that night. He thought he’d make the guy’s day by treating him to his attention, ending the night with a mercy fuck. Though Joey had regretted it, the guy was an incessant talker. This Joey didn’t mind too much, he liked his sex partners to tell him how good he was making them feel. But this particular guy had saved most of his chatter for after the event, telling Joey how it wasn’t easy for him, his wife didn’t understand him, and…Joey had tuned out the rest of the guy’s monologue.

  “I, um, I’ve seen you in here before,” the man finally spoke.

  Lifting his glass to his lips, Joey drained the contents before handing the empty glass to his companion. “Diet Coke.”

  “Oh, um, sure.” The man turned to the bar and tried to get the barman’s attention.

  Joey waited for his drink, studiously ignoring his benefactor. After the guy finally got served, he turned and gave Joey his drink.

  “Ta.”

  “Um, I’m, um, Ken. I’ve not, um, come in here that often.”

  “Uh huh.” Joey was already losing interest. The guy reeked of married, or recently divorced. Joey wasn’t going there again.

  “Yeah, well, um, it’s not easy, um, you know.”

  Joey treated the guy to a theatrical yawn, not even bothering to put his hand over his open mouth. However, the guy ploughed on, oblivious to Joey’s disinterest.

  “Look, pal,” Joey eventually said.

  “Ken,” the guy corrected.

  “Whatever. Thanks for the drink, but I just ain’t interested.”

  “Oh.” The guy slunk away, Joey sighing with relief.

  It was a slow evening, even for Saturday night. Joey surmised the inclement weather had kept most of the punters indoors. He’d been propping up the bar for about an hour when he spotted a possible hook-up come in.

  The guy did all the right things, only looking at him briefly before dropping his eyes. He was blond, early twenties, virtually all skin and bone, but Joey didn’t mind that. He was about half an inch taller, but with his bowed head, this didn’t seem to matter.

  Joey felt the guy tremble slightly when he casually draped an arm around the man’s slight frame. Joey liked them a bit timid, maybe not as timid as Kevin, though. Joey shook his head; he’d successfully managed to not think about Kevin all evening.

  The two moved to a corner booth, the other guy sitting close, almost touching. This was necessary because it was difficult to be heard above the jukebox, which was pounding out its usual mix of rock and heavy metal.

  The two spent a couple of hours together, Joey feeling the other guy up, though he steadfastly refused to allow his companion to kiss him, telling him he wasn’t into ‘all that romantic shit’. Thinking he’d reeled in his prey sufficiently, Joey asked if the guy had a place they could go back to.

  “No, sorry, I live at home with my mum and dad.”

  Joey didn’t really want the man to go back to his place, though he couldn’t identify why. He’d certainly had plenty of men in his bed before.

  Rather than allow all his hard work to go to waste, he pulled on the guy’s denim clad arm, and led him to the toilets.

  The small room was poorly lit, and stank of stale piss. They had to wait a few minutes until a couple of guys emerged from one of the cubicles, both still adjusting their trousers.

  The man—Joey had instantly forgotten his name when he’d been told it—sank to his knees the moment the door was bolted. Joey fumbled for his zipper while the other guy licked his lips in anticipation. But something was wrong. Although he’d been hard earlier at the thought of being blown by this attractive twink, now the moment of truth was upon him, Joey found himself unable to rise to the occasion. He massaged his crotch for a few moments, pretending to tease his kneeling partner. Macho pride prevented him from whipping out a soft prick.

  Closing his eyes, Joey tried to conjure up a variety of erotic images, but Kevin’s sad face kept superimposing itself onto the inside of his eyelids. “Fuck!”

  “Please, let me.” Joey felt the man reach out and press the soft bulge at his crotch.

  As soon as the man’s hand made contact, a bolt of reality, fear—or was it understanding—hit Joey. He had to find Kevin, kiss him, apologise to him and…Joey wasn’t sure what else. All he knew was that he had to get to his pup.

  Turning on his heel, Joey frantically unlocked the cubicle door and fled, almost tripping over a couple who were sixty-nining on the dirty tiled floor.

  “What’s the matter?” the abandoned twink called out.

  However, Joey wasn’t listening. He ran out of the toilets, then across the now fairly crowded pub, and out into the freezing outdoors. It had stopped raining, though Joey didn’t notice. After donning his helmet, he revved the bike’s engine before peeling out of the car park, and made his way along the quiet and relatively empty streets to Kevin’s. Fortunately his years of lorry driving had given him an excellent sense of direction. It only took five minutes to find Kevin’s block of bed-sitters, though Joey was somewhat wary of leaving his bike in that part of town, he knew he’d have to chance the fact
that the thing might not be there in the morning.

  Taking the stairs two at a time, Joey quickly realised he didn’t know which door was Kevin’s. He’d never been inside the building before. As the adrenaline in his body began to dissipate, his teeth started to chatter. He’d ridden across town without even zipping up his jacket; his only concern being getting to Kevin. Once he’d located Kevin’s door, he started to pound on it.

  There was no answer, maybe Kevin wasn’t there, Joey began to panic, but couldn’t identify why.

  “Hello?” came a soft voice from within.

  “Kevin, it’s me…Joey.”

  Joey heard the sound of the lock disengaging and a bolt being drawn back. When the door opened to reveal his pup, wearing a pair of boxer shorts and a creased white T-shirt, both Joey’s heart and his dick began to swell.

  “Uh, why’re you here?” Kevin rubbed at his eyes. Joey thought he looked so adorably cute.

  “I…was just passing.” Joey shifted his feet uncomfortably. Why the fuck couldn’t he just come out with how he was really feeling?

  “Oh, um, right. You best come in.” Kevin moved aside to allow a now shivering Joey to gain admittance.

  “Thanks.”

  “You’re cold.” Kevin reached out to touch Joey’s hand; the contact sent a warm sensation running up Joey’s arm and into his chest.

  “Um, yeah.”

  “I’ll make you a hot drink.” Kevin indicated his lone armchair.

  He busied himself lighting the gas fire then went into the tiny kitchen area. Joey watched the man as he worked; none of his movements seemed exaggerated or unnecessary. He moved with fluidity and natural grace. Joey shook his head, amazed at his poetic thoughts. He so wanted to leap from his chair and engulf the smaller man and shower him with kisses. Wasn’t that why he’d left The Black Bear and sped across town? But now he was actually in Kevin’s presence—an unexplainable something, maybe his cursed macho pride—held him back.

  Joey felt Kevin touching his arm. The gesture snapped him back to the present. “Huh?”

  Kevin treated Joey to a small smile, which went a long way to thawing out his insides. “I said, could you take your coffee black? The milk’s gone off.”